Dreams, those odd birds of the night

Dreams.  A lot of the talk between my friends these past few weeks has focused on our dreams.  What is it that makes us wish and hope?  What do we want faith for?  In an ideal world, what callings of our hearts would we pursue?

So much about life has to do with getting by.  Managing.  Doing whatever is necessary to make it from one day to the next with warm enough clothes, food in our bellies, and hopefully spare change in the bottom of our pockets.  We center our lives around not what is best or what is most desperately wanted but simply what is necessary to get by.

Likewise my friends and I find that our spiritual lives have ended up much the same way.  We seek out not what we are praying for, but simply what is necessary to keep the fires burning and the hearth safe.  We don’t pursue our own ministries, but instead fill the holes that need filling to keep the machine running.  Secretly we wonder what would happen if everyone pulled out and pursued their own visions.

Collapse.

We know it, we just don’t say it.  And somewhere in the backs of our minds lays the question, “do we really need each other so badly that self has to be sacrificed every time?”  A question not to be said out loud, because Christ sacrificed his self and we feel obligated.  Not just obligated, called.  Called to each other.

And in that reality is the death of many dreams.  Dreams who have languished for so long that we are no longer familiar with each other.  Someone asks, “what is your dream?” and we fumble for the words.  We sigh and smile at not our dream itself but the thought of a dream, the thought of having something to wish for, the thought that maybe there are still fairy godmothers who will rescue us in the eleventh hour.

A wise man says, “start putting aside seed for your dreams now, so they can be harvested in your lifetime.”

I have no seed, just words.

So I set aside words.  Words not for the dream, but for the hope of the dream.  Words so that perhaps one day I will be brave enough to dream again.

The good Book says, “the Kingdom of God is forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it.”

Ah, I am a woman.  Perhaps that is my problem.

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12 thoughts on “Dreams, those odd birds of the night

  1. Beautiful. Lindsey, Honestly I would say you are living your dream each and every day. You are living as an example to all of us.

    You do have your ministry. A ministry online with tons of followers. Your wisdom, strength, tollerance, forgiveness, kindness and wit reaches so many. People who have been cast aside by others because they were different. You welcome them with open arms and a warm heart.

    You teach others by who you are each day. You are amazing. To my mind a true follower of Jesus. Not someone who just talks the talk, but lives and breathes it and walks in his footsteps.

    What better could you do with your life?

  2. I think sometimes it is easier for others to see because their eyes are less clouded than our own. From my perspective all the way far far away (forgive me now if I am wrong) but you have been writing that book for a while now and it’s incredible, is it not one of your dreams to have it published? As I said forgive me if I have totally lost the plot (highly probable).

    I agree with Amber, her description of you is exactly how I see it, you are one of a kind and amazing at that!

    Sometimes we are living our dreams without us even realising it, sometimes the one thing we need to spark them off is just around the corner, sometimes its in the flowers and the trees, sometimes it is just us.

    I love dreaming 🙂

  3. Lindsey-

    The good Book says, “the Kingdom of God is forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it.”

    Ah, I am a woman. Perhaps that is my problem.

    Are you really being serious when you say this?

  4. I think sometimes we sell God a bit short.

    Lindsey, you write about (basically) sacrificing what we want and giving all we have for ministry and obediance as did Jesus the Christ. Then you go on to say our dreams have been languishing.

    I am sure you recall the story of Joseph. Sold into slavery by his brothers, put into a dungeon in Potifers house only to have his very brothers come to him decades later and beg him for grain to sustain their very lives. Joseph ended up being the secnond most powerful man in that region. All because regardless of how it looked or how long it took he remained faithful to the Lord and what he knew to be the right thing to do.

    Now specifically addressing dreams. I tried this for a season and I found some remarkable things happening.

    I kept a writing pad next to my bed and a pen/pencil and every night before I would trail off to sleep I would audibally say, “Good night Lord. Speak to me for your servant is listening.” If I would get up in the night for whatever reason I would write down my dream/thoughts and in the morning too. Don’t think you will remember. Most likely you won’t. Write things down immediately.

  5. Amber: That’s what my husband says as well. 🙂

    SF: That’s very true. Finishing my novel and seeing it in print is a very large dream of mine, sometimes one of the only dreams. But I do hold on to it, because it’s one dream that I may yet taste.

    Stephanie: Joking. A little. As a woman I am often asked to take on roles that I wouldn’t be as a man, like filling in when there are gaps in the children’s ministry (which means rarely being in the sanctuary on a Sunday morning even though I attend every week.)

  6. M54: Oh, very good point! That and Abraham- look what happened as Abraham fought to make dreams become real in his own time, sleeping with a servant to ensure he had a son who he later sent away (to become lifelong enemies with the son God later gave him.)

    Often we anticipate that things should become as we expect, when God has a far larger plan. This has mostly been true with my novel. I wanted it published years ago, but instead situations aligned for me to end up re-writing it from the start again. And it is a FAR better novel now. Thank GOD I didn’t get what I wanted when I wanted it!

  7. Lindesy- Ok, thought so, just checking.

    “……like filling in when there are gaps in the children’s ministry (which means rarely being in the sanctuary on a Sunday morning even though I attend every week.)”

    Yeah, know what you mean. I’m doing the same thing.

  8. Lindsey, re read amberfireinus’s post. I can’t add much except to say that dreams can change and when they do the new dream is usually better.

  9. Lindsey, this is my first time here. You sound not so happy today with the way your life is going. I think we have all experienced that and, from the previous posts, it sounds as if you have a good bunch of encouragers here. Good for you. Mainly, I wanted to add encouragement and to say that sometimes, when we have little ones, we often feel as though there is nowhere for the “me”, the dreams, the desires of our hearts that God promised. Lindsey, I thank you for taking care of those little ones, for bringing them up in the ways of God, and to assure you that God WILL give you the desires of your heart; maybe He has something more important for you to do in this season of your life.
    Thanks for letting me reply and I shall return.

  10. FreetoBe: Thanks for the comment. I wouldn’t say that I’m necessarily unhappy- I have a good daily life with two brilliant babies and a nice house and lawn to care for. It’s just that every once in a while I remember that there was a time that I wanted to be a psychologist or researcher and I think, “who made me a housewife?”
    Then I remember, oh, God did. And I’m sure he had a reason for it. 😀

  11. Dreams: some of the accounts in the early chapters of the Gospel of Luke speak not of literal dreams, but of long-cherished hopes.

    Elizabeth and Zecharian

    Simeon

    Anna

    Even Mary, and (referencing Matthew) Joseph, too.

    In the OT, think of Sarah’s laughter, and then… of the son.

    All received unexpected answers to prayers, hopes, dreams.

    And then there are those dreams that thoroughly upend *our* dreams, like the one Peter had of the animals in the sheet.

    I’m rambling, but I think my point is in there somewhere… 😉

  12. I think we have dreams but for me it’s more a case of what God wants. Trying to identify what that is proves problematic. Varying people and denominations have varying opinions on it. I don’t pretend to have it figured out.

    At this stage in my life I’m just asking for wisdom, discernment and that I give God the space to move. Surrendering our dreams is difficult especially when God gave them to us

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